...Desperate...Undeserving

So desperate yet so undeserving are we…

So desperately searching for that which will fill our souls,

That which will take away the sorrow and nurse our wounds,

That which having seen what and who we truly are,

Our ugly scars and deep dark secrets,

Our inadequacies,

Our baggage,

Our wounds,

Will accept us as we are

We desperately seek that which we cannot define…

We seek love…yet we are so undeserving

So undeserving of true love….

Yet strangely we remain oblivious to that which we truly need.

Buzzing around like a bee from flower to flower taking in all we can from each person

Yet, it still is not enough.

Confusing passion for love, spending nights in each others arms

Intertwined and locked

Thinking this will fill our empty souls,

The deep cry of our hearts to be loved…truly loved

So desperately seeking it yet still so undeserving

You see we’ve become so wrapped in what the world calls love,

We lost the true meaning of it

Now we equate passion to love

Forgetting that while love is passionate, passion is not love

We forget that ultimately, sex should be an expression of our love

Not the basis

That it is a gift from God

We abuse it thinking we know

We are thrown back and forth,

Our own hearts in dire need of this true love,

Lost in what we think we know

Not remembering that the heart of man is desperately wicked
So blindly we go on

Our search continues

Desperately searching yet so undeserving

The answer is etched deep in the earth’s foundations

Before all time

So as I run into yet another relationship, I miss out again

I miss out on true love…still desperate yet undeserving

Still hopelessly blind
Hoping this time I'm right...

God still standing on the side lines wondering when I’ll let Him have my heart...
Oh my heart...
My heart that is so bent on breaking every rule
My heart that is so given to wickedness
My heart that He gave His Son for
Yet I turn away

He stands waiting, When will I let Him take control??

Me not knowing that He has what I seek so desperately yet don’t deserve

True Love…

I hope one day I will realize.

So my quest continues, Still desperately seeking yet so undeserving…